Quite simply, by reducing all of the crap and distraction in your life, and mindfully focusing on the things that really truly matter – then not only will you be living a more fulfilling and meaningful life, you will also be clearing a pathway for self-discipline and efficiency in your life… or that is the hypothesis anyhow.
Highlights of the book:
The book, minimalism covers 5 core areas to focus on in order to live a meaningul life through the mindful practice of minimalism as follows:
Health;
Relationships;
Passion (or Purpose);
Growth; and
Contribution.
Health is an obvious one for any one on a self-discipline journey. Healthy body = healthy mind. Effectively eating healthier, exercising regularly and self-care are the core principles promoted in this section (with a disclaimer by the authors noting they in no way purport to be any kind of medical practitioner or hold any qualifications of the sort). Nice one.
Relationships is the section that particularly appealed to me. Joshua and Ryan put forward the importance of having healthy, flourishing, connected relationships with your loved ones.
Applying principles of minimalism in this area – they suggest writing a list of all the people you interact with in your life. Then categorise each person into primary, secondary or peripheral. Once you have categorised each person, reflect on whether that person has a positive, negative or nuetral impact on your life. With the peripheral connections, contemplate, do you wish to move or grow any of these connections into secondary relationships? If so, what do you need to do… the way they word it is “what must you do” to grow these connections in to secondary connections. Finally, in this exercise, reflect on the time you spend with each of those connections. The authors propose you should be investing the majority of your time and energy into your primary relationships.
Where are you investing your energy?
In the next part of the relationships exercise- the authors talk about growth in relationships and the three ways to increase relationship growth:
Make new amazing connections and relationships with people;
Improve the current relationships you have with people through investing and connecting in them; or
Change yourself so that you become the person your desired friends want to be with.
How must you change to attract the friends you want?
This is the crux of this chapter that really appealed to me personally. Creating a vision board for your ideal friends. Who is your tribe? What are their desires? their wants? Their needs? How do they make you feel? what do you do together? Where do these friends hang out and what are their interests?
I personally have never made a vision board for an ideal friend, but for some reason absolutely love the idea. So this week, my mission is to embrace the friend vision board and see what appears on the other side. Importantly, once you have reflected on this (ie. your ideal friend), ask yourself, am I the person that friend wants to be around? and if not, what mustI change to be that person?
Deep.
Passion is the third core principle the authors focus on. Without passion/or purpose, what is driving your life? What is driving you to greatness?
In this section they discuss the road blocks that prevent people from finding their true passion or purpose in life as follows:
Anchor of Identity
Anchor of Career
Anchor of Status
Anchor of Money
The authors suggest, if we get too caught up on caring about how we appear, identifying with our career, status or thinking we need a certain amount of money before we can express our passions or find our purpose, we may never find our purpose and instead end up living a life based on what we think other people expect of us, rather than listening to the inner driving force within.
They propose that people focus less on “what do you do?” implying, what is your career when commencing a conversation, and focus more on exploring peoples passions, hobbies, desires, purpose in life. The things that really matter and speak to each of our hearts and souls.
Finally, the book briefly covers growth and contribution.
With regard to growth their approach is in relation to taking small, incremental, consistent steps daily until those tiny steps flow into a giant leap… and with regard to contribution, being part of something bigger than ourselves is an important part of living a meaningful life. If you don’t know where to start volunteer with a local community organisation.
I love this -as I have found the more you appreciate or give to others, the more you live in a space of gratitude in your life, which quite frankly, makes everything better in life.
“You are sitting in the most magnificent garden you have ever seen. The garden is filled with flowers. Feel you have all the time in the world to indulge in the beauty of the garden.
there is a towering light house. 9 ft tall sumo wrestler comes out of a red door. He has a pink cable protecting his private parts. He finds a shiny gold stop watch which someone had left behind years earlier.
Slips on it and falls to the ground unconscious. He is stirred by fragrance of beautiful roses.
He looks to the left and sees a long winding path covered in diamonds. He is compelled to take the path and this path leads him to everlasting joy and eternal happiness”
“Timeless principle for radiant living”
SYMBOLS for the 7 timeless virtues for radiant living:
Garden
Lighthouse
Pink Wireless Cable
The Stopwatch
The roses
The long winding path
The diamonds.
Apply these on a daily basis, you will change mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually:
THE MOST EXTRAORDINARY GARDEN
The garden represents your MIND. If you care for your mind. If you nurture it and cultivate it, it will blossom far beyond your expectations. If you, however let the weeds take plant.
To live life to the fullest, you must stand guard at the gate of your mind. You must not allow a single negative thought in, not even one.
Adopt a positive paradigm for the world. The way you think is a product of habit. Simple.
Condition your mind.
See your mind for what it is, natures greatest gift. There is no such thing as objective reality, or absolute truths.
All success in life – whether material or spiritual starts in your mind. By controlling the way you think you will own your life.
“There are no mistakes in life, only lessons” “From struggle comes strength” “To transcend pain you must have first experienced it”
Stop judging events as positive or negative. Rather, simply1ust experience them, see what they teach you.
Begin to live out of the glory of your imagination not your memory.
Things are always created twice – first in your mind, then in reality. “Blue printing” – anything you create in your outer world you created as a lush blue print.
Unlock the true potential of your mind to create the kind of magical life. Expect the best, you will be astonished at the results.
Sports hero/Business tycoon. It is a freedom and joy.
When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all of your thoughts break their bonds: your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties and talents become alive and you discover yourself to be a greater person than you ever dreamed yourself to be.
Connection between physical vitality & mental agility. By changing your thoughts, you can change your life.
Diligently apply strategies daily for 1 month you will be astonished at the results. Enjoy the process of personal expansion and growth.
Key principles
First, concentration is at the root of desire. The fact that you have a desire or dream means you have the corresponding capacity to realise it. To liberate the power of the mind you must be able to harness it and direct its focus on what is at hand.
“Find out what you truly love to do and then direct all of your energy towards doing it”.
If it is a worthy pursuit. Your passion must in some way improve or serve the lives of others.
Deep sense of inner harmony.
Those who rise with the sun have one thing in common, they have purpose. Not in an obsessive way. They live in the moment, their attention is completely on the task at hand.
Needless and endless worry. Once you find your purpose – life becomes easier and far more rewarding. Your life will be play.
You will have to start taking risks. Your mind your body and your soul.
Stop being so practical. Start doing the things you always wanted to do. Find the things you love.
Daily incremental improvements. 10 minutes of focused reflection per day will have profound impact on your life.
“The Heart of the Rose” – ingredients fresh rose and silent place
Look at the rose, savour its flavour, its look, return your attention to the object of your focus. Soon your mind will grow strong and focused. Persist. Spend longer each day focusing longer on the heart of the rose.
It is your island of peace. There is power in silence and peace.
“Opposition Thinking”. The mind can only hold ONE THOUGHT at ANY ONE TIME.
CCreate a positive, creative mindset. When a negative thought comes in mind, replace it with a positive thought. They are reminders that I still have a distance to travel on the road to mental mastery.
Step 1 become aware you are thinking uninspiring thoughts
Step 2, think of positive thoughts, breath deeply, train the power of your mind on positive thoughts.
You cannot afford the luxury of even 1 negative thought.
Manifest your desires into reality. “The SECRET OF THE LAKE”
The early morning …. The sages would look into the lake and envision their dreams becoming a reality. If it was the virtue of discipline they wished to cultivate within theirlives they would picture themselves getting up at dawn and performing their rigorous physical regimen without fail and spending days in silence to enhance their will power.
If itwas courage they desired tehy would picture themselves with strength in the moment of crisis and challenge.
The mind works through pictures. Pictures effect your self image and effect the way you feel, act and achieve.
See yourself as you want to be. Shut the door, close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, visualise mental pictures of all you want to be, to have, and attain in your life.
Picture yourself acting gracefully, lovingly. The magic of visualisationj can be applied to many situations. The power of your mind has potential to attract all into your life.
A MAGNIFICENT LIGHTHOUSE
“The purpose of life is a life of purpose”
Those who are truly enlightened know what they want out of life, emotionally, materially, physically, spiritually. Clearly defined priorities and goals for every aspecto f yoru life will serve a role similar to that played by a lighthouse offering you guidance and refuge when the seas become rough.
Achievement. Comes through consistent application.
Dharma is based on the ancient principle that we each have a heroic journey while we walk on this earth. Find your heroic life. Make sure it serves others.
Goal setting is just the beginning. People spend their whole lives dreaming of becoming happier, living with more vitality and having abundance of passion” Take 10 minutes to write out your goals. Think deeply about the meaning of your life. Goal setting will make your life magnificent.
Set clearly defined objectives in the mental, physical and spiritual world. Write down your dreams. Know what you want from every game. Develop a game plan for your own life.
What is so special about writing your goals?
By writing down your goals you send a RED FLAG to your subconscious mind about what is important.
LIFE AIMS.
You change your life once you set your goals. It tells your message what to focus on. Concentrate every ounce of your mind on self-discovery. The
CONCENTRATE YOUR MIND ON A PURSUIT THAT YOU LOVE.
5 step method to reach purpose of life
Step 1 – form a clear mental image of the outcome
Step 2 – get positive pressure on yourself. How can i create positive pressure? – public pledge – tell everyone you know about what you are doing – associate pleasure with good habits and punishment with bad habits
Step 3 – never set a goal without a timeline – you must have a precise timeframe/date. Get to know yourself. Buy a dream book and write all of your dreams.
Divide your dream book into the different areas of your life Physical Fitness Goals Financial Goals, Personal Empowerment Goals, your relationship, social goals, and Spiritual Goals
Fill your dream book with the pictures of the things you desire and images of people who cultivate the abilities, talents and qualities you hope to emulate. If you want to lose weight and be in outstanding physical shape paste a picture of a marathon runner or elite athlete in your dream book. Review it daily. Passion a burning sense of passion must be at the forefront of your mind. Reclaim the morning. Be the master of your fate.
What lies behind you and what lies in front of you is nothing compared to what lies within you.
THE ART OF SELF-LEADERSHIP
Symbol – 9ft tall, 900 pound Japanese Sumo Wrestler.
The Sumo wrestler represents Kaizen meaning “constant and never ending improvement”. If you really want to improve your outer world (such as your finances) you must first improve your inner world. You can do this through the practice of continuous self-improvement.
Self improvement – personal exploration. TAking the time to nurture your mind, care for your body and nourish your soul.
Building strength of character, developing mental toughness and building courage.
The degree of courage you live with is the degree of self-fulfilment you experience. Mind body soul.
Ancient powerful techniques – do as many pushups as you can possibly do. Don’t stop until you can do no more.Then do ten more.
You had more inside you. When you reached for your resources you received more. When you push beyond your limits you develop mental and physical gifts …
Do the things you fear.
Identify your weaknesses and attack them head on. When you conquer your fears, you conquer your life.
FEAR is a conditioned response. When you erase fear from your life you become younger and your life more vibrant.
Once you get yourself in order your life will fall into place.
ART OF KAIZEN
Ageless principle of self-mastery
10 ageless principles and rituals
Practice for 1 hour per day for 30 days
Keep practicing every day to keep seeing the results.
The 10 Rituals of Radiant Living
Ritual of Solitude – healing power of silence at least 15 minutes per day. Spend some time alone. Find a place of true quiet and beauty to practice… “the sanctuary of yourself” – a peaceful corner at your home. It works best if you practice it at the same time every day. In nature is ideal. Result – deep sense of inner harmony and abundance of energy.
Ritual of physicality – “as you care for the body, so you care for the mind” – nourish the temple of your body daily through the practice of daily vigorous exercise. Yoga, vigorous walking in nature. Learn the art of effective breathing will increase your natural state of vitality. 2 or 3 times per day take a minute or two to think about breathing deeply from the belly.
The Ritual of Live Nourishment – “as you nourish your body as you nourish your mind” – LIVE FOODS – sun, earth, air and water. Eat live foods. Eat as many vegetarian foods as possible (RAW??) At least add salad and fruit to every meal.
Ritual of Abundant Knowledge – notion of life long learning. Read regularly – at least 30 minutes per day. Dont read anything, read something that will improve you and the quality fo your life. Read it 10 or 15 times – as scriptures. 30 minutes a day will make a delightful difference in your life. Read the RIGHT books and learn how the people who have proceeded you…. Think Great Americdan, Benjamin Franklin, Mahatma Ghandi “ the story of my experiments with truth”, Siddharta by Hermann Hesse, “the highly practical philosophy” byMarcus Aurelius, some of the work of Seneca and “think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill. Think and grow rich is about abundance. Read and keep reading…. “Books simply help you to see what is already in yourself”
The Ritual of Personal Reflection – every night sit in deep contemplation and take inventory of their day. First list all of your activities, then write down the thoughts that had run down during the day in one column, then do an assessment in another column. Were they positive in nature? If they were he would keep them, if they weren’t helpful he would eliminate that thought/activity.
Ritual of Early Awakening. Rise with the sun. Most of us sleep far more than we should. First never forget quality over quantity of sleep … never eat after 8pm. Meditate to soft sound of harp before sleeping up. 10 minute period before you sleep and when you wake up relax, have some herbal tea, listen to soft classical music. The better the sleep – the less you will need. If you do anythign for 21 days in a row, it will become a habit. If you wake up early – think positive thoughts, give prayer of thanks for all that you have… the average 4 year old laughs 300 times per day, laughter is medicine for the soul. Laugh for 15 minutes to start off the day. Heart of rose, drink fresh juice/water, go into your sanctuary of silence and ask yourself this question “what would I do today if this day was my last??” if you live every day as though it were your last you will savour it.
Ritual of MUSIC – never forget the power of music.
Ritual of the Spoken Word. A mantra is a collection of words together – ma means mind and tra means freeing… so they are words that free the mind. “I am inspired, disciplined and energised” Repeat a mantra “I am strong, able and calm”
Ritual of Congruent Character – take daily action to build your character. “You sow a thought, you reap an action. Reap an action, you sow a habit. Sow a habit, you reap a character. Sow a character, you reap your destiny.”
Life’s calling/principles: industry, compassion, humility, patience, honesty and courage.
Ritual of Simplicity – focus only on your priorities. Your life will be uncluttered, simple. The key is … don’t focus on the goal, enjoy the process.
THE POWER OF DISCIPLINE
The sumo wrestler was start naked except for the pink cable. The pink cable will serve to remind you of the power of self-control and discipline in building a virtuous disciplined life.
Self control and willpower are similar to a cable. A cable consists of many thin wires, each alone flimsy and weak… yet together their sum is much greater than their constituent parts adn the cable becomes tougher than iron.
To build a will of iron, it is essential to take small tiny acts … the lack of willpower is a mental disease.
It is willpower that allows you to keep your commitments to other people, and more importantly to yourself.
Through the steel of discipline you will forge a character rich with courage and peace. Through the virtue of will.
Self-control and discipline will bring you a tremendous sense of freedom. Ths alone is amazing. When you master your mind, you master your life. When you have managed to discard all weak thoughts and only maintain those taht are positive.
“I am more than i appear to be, all the world’s strength and power rests inside me” repeat this 30 times per day
YOUR MOST PRECIOUS COMMODITY
The shiny gold stopwatch is a symbol of our most precious commodity – TIME.
Time is the greatest leveler. Time mastery leads to life mastery – remember it is a non-renewable resource.
Plan your week and manage your time carefully/creatively. Have the discipline to focus your time around your priorities. The most meaningful things in your life should never be sacrificed.
80% of the results you achieve in your life come from 20% of your effort.
Only 20% of what you do will have an impact on the quality of your life. Watching telly & gossiping …
“Enlightened people are priority driven”
Direct all of your attention to the things that count. Time mastery. Say no to the little things so you have time to do the big things.
Do the things that less productive people do not like doing. Those who are masters of their lives live SIMPLE lives.
Develop a deathbed mentality. Act as though failure is impossible. Be brave. Become the architect of your future and your life will never be the same.
THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE
When all is said and done, what matters in life is that the quality of your life comes down to the quality of your contribution.
Symbol – the Fresh Yellow Roses – Chinese proverb “a little bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives you roses” meaning when you improve the lives of others you indirectly elevate your own life in the process. When you take care to practice random acts of kindness daily, your own life becomes far richer and more meaningful. To cultivate the sacredness and sanctity of each day, serve others in some way.
The only one real reason you are here on earth is to give yourself to others. Measure people by the size of their hearts. People are realising they are here for a purpose. We each have a gift – unlock your treasures and apply them for common good.
See yourself as part of the community, rather than an individual. Start striving towards making the world a better place. Compassion and daily acts of kindness will improve your life.
A person with 3 solid friends is wealthy indeed. Mend and cultivate your friendships.
THE TIMELESS SECRET TO LIFELONG HAPPINESS
Final Element of the fable…
A long windy path studded with millions of tiny diamonds.
It is there to remind you of the virtue of enlightened living.
“Living in the now”. The most important moment is now. Learn to live in it and savour it accordingly.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination. Live for today. There will never be another one quite like it.
You can start to have the life you deserve the very moment you start to understand that the path you are currently walking on is one rich with diamonds and other priceless treasures. Enjoy the beauty and sacredness of all that is around you. You owe this to yourself”
Never put off happiness for the sake of achievement. Never forget the gift of family.
Few things are as meaningful as your children’s childhood.
Happiness is a journey. Enjoy the special moments that every day offers because today this day is all that you have.
You can train yourself to enjoy the gift of living and fill yourself with the existence of jewels of life.
When you savour the now, you kindle the fire of life that fuels your destiny.
Discover your higher purpose and follow the path of your dreams. Grow your destiny by putting all of your focus and attention on this.
“Breath is the bridge which connects life to consciousness, which unites your body to your thoughts. Whenever your mind becomes scattered, use your breath as the means to take hold of your mind again.”
Who is Patrick McKeown? and What does he have to say???
According to Amazon:
Patrick McKeown is an international breath expert and Oxygen Advantage® founder. He has provided breath training to improve breathing, sleep, anxiety, resilience, concentration and chronic illness since 2002.
Patrick is the founder and Director of Education for Oxygen Advantage®, which teaches functional breathing for resilience and improved sports performance. There are currently more than 3,000 trained Oxygen Advantage® instructors across 50 countries.
Effectively the book discusses how breathing better can literally change your life.
Patrick puts forward that since cave man days people have been breathing through their noses. Mouth breathing was reserved for stress situations triggered by our flight or fight reaction. He suggests that we actually breathe too much oxygen in the modern era.
The science that really turns things on its head in your mind is that in order for oxygen to transfer into the haemoglobin and spread to all the organs around the body, you actually need a higher level of CO2 in the body. Meaning breathing less oxygen, or breathing better quality oxygen (meaning breathing via your nose rather than your mouth) leads to higher levels of oxygen to all of your organs.
Why do we care?
The better we become at breathing through our nose the healthier we become over time.
One of the most unusual suggestions he puts forward is to tape your mouth at night with medical tape to force yourself to breathe through your nose rather than your mouth. Disclaimer, I have no medical credentials and have yet to even try this technique myself. I’m keen though.
I am assured by the word of mouth of Patrick’s followers that with persistence, I will improve and be ever more grateful for it.
So, check out The Oxygen Advantage if you are interested in reprogramming your baseline so that you have the right foundational blocks for your self-discipline journey.
This year we are solely focusing on self-discipline. It is 2024, self-discipline is the goal.
Self-discipline is my ultimate goal and the starting point of everything great in life!! So, self-discipline is what we are going to be chewing over via numerous resources, books, experts throughout 2024 to see if we can develop the skills, strategies, techniques and motivation to achieve self-discipline on a daily basis.
What is self-discipline?
To start with, a lot of theories say it is about the process rather than the outcome. This is an aspect of my life I wish to develop, cultivate, fine tune and excel at and I am inviting you to join me on the journey!!!
What are the elements of self-discipline?
Self Control
Motivation
Persistence
Goals
Apparently these are the 4 core elements for cultivating or demonstrating self-discipline in our lives.
What holds us back from succeeding at achieving these milestones in our daily lives?
Personally – a massive road block in my own life is a lack of self-worth. Sounds bad, but hold back on those violins! Many people I know struggle with the same issue! We just don’t like to talk about it, right?
So how do we overcome these shortcomings to reach our goals? I do not know the answer to that question but boy am I excited to find out… so join along, week by week (we will be aiming for a weekly Sunday post update!) and maybe we can find out the exciting answers together!!
Stay tuned and catch you all this Sunday!! 7 January 2023 for our next episode.
Basically they are your run of the mill dudes that have done the normal thing (ie. they have a background in sales and marketing), it didn’t work out so great or they weren’t so satisfied with living the “American Dream” and decided to try something new, fresh and novel.
Minimalism.
They love it. They love the freedom it brings them. They love the empowerment. The improved relationships.
Quite frankly …. I’m sold
This week we are discussing the key elements of being a successful Minimalist according to Joshua and Ryan.
Have integrity – do what you say and say what you do! Build trust with the people you work with.
FOCUS, according to Bill Gates and Warren Buffett is the number one attribute you require in life to achieve success.
SUCCESS PLAN
Have a goal (SMART goals)
Make a plan with specific measurable milestones
Take action. Start taking action on the first step in your milestone list.
Failure is a milestone, not a destination. Persistence, consistency is essential until you achieve your goal.
Never doubt your ability to achieve success. In Warren Buffet’s words “I always knew I was going to be rich. I never doubted it for a minute.” Believe in yourself!!!
One of the most important decisions you will ever make in your life is who you choose as your life partner.
You want to associate with people who are the kind of people you would like to be.
Ultimately – they will have the most influence on you in the long term and this includes your career.
A study done in St Louis by Brittany Sullivan and Joshua Jackson at Washington University has shown us that having a conscientious spouse who is involved in the career of the other spouse can boost one’s salary significantly.
Why?
Because conscientiousness means taking the time to involve oneself in the activities that allow the other partner to flourish.
This attentive attention comes across as support.
People with a conscientious partner are 60% more likely to become promoted and flourish in succeeding at their long term goals.
Faith G Harper is a counsellor, therapist, hypnotherapist.
Anger is normal and there to give you an important message. Are you listening?
9 anger triggers
–life threatening– fight for your lie.
–insult, disrespect – when we perceive disruption of social order, who threatens our status
–family – we will all protect our family
-environment– we are all wired to protect our territory
–mate – in order to have children, build a legacy we need a mate. It is natural to want to protect your mate.
–order in society – our survival is interdependent on social order, social system. People who rock the boat trigger a fear response=they
–resources – humans will go to great lengths to protect their resources
–tribe – people will protect their people against others. Resource depletion. Border walls. Gang violence..war
– stopped – all humans will respond to restraint preventing them from freedom. Expression of free will
Rage circuit
Anger starts from AHEN (acronym)
A = Anger emerges from
H = HURT
E = Expectations not met
N = NEEDS not met
How to use ahen
Am I hurt?
Did something happen here that made me feel undervalued?
Why the hurt? Did I have Expectations not met? Was it a realistic expectation?
Is it life changing?
Was it a reasonable expectation? Did I have needs that were not met?
When the person we needed to most feel safe did something to make us question that safety… we need a community that loves us silly and makes us feel safe.
Anger provides the energy for change the anger we don’t allow to express acknowledge makes us sick
Managing anger, communicating anger and exercising forgiveness.
Riding the wave technique
Think of each emotion as a wave crashing on the shore
We can’t stop them from coming.
Experience your feelings. You are not your feelings. They are something you experience.
Develop an understanding with your feelings. Just accept its existence.
Acknowledging anger. Admitting and owning through emotional state. “I feel” statement.
Focusing on our victimhood strengthens the perpetrator abuser for years after .
If we instead focus on our capacity for survival and overcoming adversity it lessons the power those people have over us.
Let’s SOLVE your problem. Get out of your emotional mind and into a cerebral analysis.
S – STATE YOUR PROBLEM. DETAIL SPECIFICALLY
O – OUTLINE YOUR RESPONSE. USUAL RESPONSE. WHO WHAT WHERE WHY WHEN HOW
L – LIST ALL YOUR POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS. ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS. COME UP
V – VISUALISE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES. CONSEQUENCES. WHAT ARE ALL THE LONG AND SHORT TERM OUTCOMES.
E – EVALUATE YOUR RESULTS. WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES? DO YOU NEED TO REASSESS
physiological anger responses.
Literally.
Physical body
Singing. Come up with a story of anger.
Humor. Genuine silliness
Intentional breathing exercises
Mindfulness meditation
Mantra Meditation
Yoga tai chi chi jong
Mindfulness meditation works on everyone
Forgiveness is selfish as fuck. Nothing wrong with selfishness and demonstrating self care.
Use that energy to go change the world in bad-ass ways.
It’s not about eating shit to keep the peace
It’s about holding stronger boundaries in the future.
How do you know there is something to forgive?
Do you find yourself stuck in the story of the event?
Do you focus on the negative feelings from the past versus the great feelings you experience now
Your past does not have to be your identity.
Episodic forgiveness
2. Feel your anger and pain and share that story with someone safe. “We can’t forgive what we can’t acknowledge” … don’t spiritual bypass by saying things like “everything happens for a reason”… Recognise, acknowledge and work through. Have self-compassion
STRATEGIES FOR FORGIVENESS 1. Ceremony. Hold ceremony to let go.
3. Find the helpers and the givers, not the enablers.. B around people
4. Consider the attribution process. Find the non-personal in the circumstances. We tend to see that we were good despite our errors but see others behaviors as caused by their core badness. Become curious like a social scientist –
5. Be specific about what happened to you.
6. Justice has nothing to do with forgiveness.
7. Don’t mix forgiveness with reconciliation. Just because your
Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill is a wonderful all time favourite.
To kick start 2023 on the right foot AlphaMama is discussing the secrets as well as potential pitfalls held within it’s pages.
If you want to kickstart your year (with many countries globally set for a significant recession) with the right mindset and an elbow greased with your best ‘can-do’ attitude then this is the book you are looking for!!
