Faith G Harper is a counsellor, therapist, hypnotherapist.
Anger is normal and there to give you an important message. Are you listening?
9 anger triggers
–life threatening– fight for your lie.
–insult, disrespect – when we perceive disruption of social order, who threatens our status
–family – we will all protect our family
-environment– we are all wired to protect our territory
–mate – in order to have children, build a legacy we need a mate. It is natural to want to protect your mate.
–order in society – our survival is interdependent on social order, social system. People who rock the boat trigger a fear response=they
–resources – humans will go to great lengths to protect their resources
–tribe – people will protect their people against others. Resource depletion. Border walls. Gang violence..war
– stopped – all humans will respond to restraint preventing them from freedom. Expression of free will
Rage circuit
Anger starts from AHEN (acronym)
A = Anger emerges from
H = HURT
E = Expectations not met
N = NEEDS not met
How to use ahen
Am I hurt?
Did something happen here that made me feel undervalued?
Why the hurt? Did I have Expectations not met? Was it a realistic expectation?
Is it life changing?
Was it a reasonable expectation? Did I have needs that were not met?
When the person we needed to most feel safe did something to make us question that safety… we need a community that loves us silly and makes us feel safe.
Anger provides the energy for change the anger we don’t allow to express acknowledge makes us sick
Managing anger, communicating anger and exercising forgiveness.
Riding the wave technique
Think of each emotion as a wave crashing on the shore
We can’t stop them from coming.
Experience your feelings. You are not your feelings. They are something you experience.
Develop an understanding with your feelings. Just accept its existence.
Acknowledging anger. Admitting and owning through emotional state. “I feel” statement.
Focusing on our victimhood strengthens the perpetrator abuser for years after .
If we instead focus on our capacity for survival and overcoming adversity it lessons the power those people have over us.
Let’s SOLVE your problem. Get out of your emotional mind and into a cerebral analysis.
S – STATE YOUR PROBLEM. DETAIL SPECIFICALLY
O – OUTLINE YOUR RESPONSE. USUAL RESPONSE. WHO WHAT WHERE WHY WHEN HOW
L – LIST ALL YOUR POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS. ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS. COME UP
V – VISUALISE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES. CONSEQUENCES. WHAT ARE ALL THE LONG AND SHORT TERM OUTCOMES.
E – EVALUATE YOUR RESULTS. WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES? DO YOU NEED TO REASSESS
physiological anger responses.
Literally.
Physical body
Singing. Come up with a story of anger.
Humor. Genuine silliness
Intentional breathing exercises
Mindfulness meditation
Mantra Meditation
Yoga tai chi chi jong
Mindfulness meditation works on everyone
Forgiveness is selfish as fuck. Nothing wrong with selfishness and demonstrating self care.
Use that energy to go change the world in bad-ass ways.
It’s not about eating shit to keep the peace
It’s about holding stronger boundaries in the future.
How do you know there is something to forgive?
Do you find yourself stuck in the story of the event?
Do you focus on the negative feelings from the past versus the great feelings you experience now
Your past does not have to be your identity.
Episodic forgiveness
2. Feel your anger and pain and share that story with someone safe. “We can’t forgive what we can’t acknowledge” … don’t spiritual bypass by saying things like “everything happens for a reason”… Recognise, acknowledge and work through. Have self-compassion
STRATEGIES FOR FORGIVENESS 1. Ceremony. Hold ceremony to let go.
3. Find the helpers and the givers, not the enablers.. B around people
4. Consider the attribution process. Find the non-personal in the circumstances. We tend to see that we were good despite our errors but see others behaviors as caused by their core badness. Become curious like a social scientist –
5. Be specific about what happened to you.
6. Justice has nothing to do with forgiveness.
7. Don’t mix forgiveness with reconciliation. Just because your
Morgan Housel was a financial columnest for the Motley Fool and Wall Street Journal. He is also the author of The Psychology of Money which has sold over one million copies. He is now a partner of the Collaborative Fund which is an investment firm focused on supporting and investing in the shared future.The firm’s funds focus on investments around two macro themes: the growth of the creative class, and the concept of the collaborative economy.
Why the Psychology of Money?
Morgan notes in his book, the Psychology of Money, that there is a lot of literature around budgeting and how to do finances but a lot of literature does not account for or focus on the fact that humans are irrational balls of emotion that do not behave in consistent, reliable ways. Many of our choices are formed via emotion and the way we feel – and we can see this reflected in how we choose to invest.
In his book (and article) he goes through 20 points on the psychology of money, looking at the concept of risk versus luck and reflecting on people who have a lot of things versus people who have wealth and how the wealthiest people in the world have exercised consistent investing over time to reach their fortunes.
I loved his analysis of Warren Buffet noting that Buffet started investing at the age of 10 years old. By the time he was 30 years old he had reached his first million. He mentioned that he has averaged returns of 22% over time and it is really TIME that is the critical element in his success. When you compound 22% returns over time, you quickly find you are snowballing wealth. Most of his fortune has come over the age of 60 years.
In the same vein he refers to Jim Simon’s who has made over a billion dollars from investing between 1988 until 2018. He achieved this by using quantified trading strategies, for the Medallion Fund and managed to return on average 66.1% gross before fees from 1988 until 2018. Jim Simon’s has been a more successful investor than Warren Buffet, however he has not been doing it for as long so ultimately it is TIME that is the secret to enormous amounts of wealth.
So what are the secret strategies to being a successful investor according to Housel?
Here are some of my favourite tips from the book:
If you spend your income on things, you will have things instead of wealth. In order to accumulate wealth you need to save money and invest it rather than spending it on items.
In order to have the grit and resilience to save wealth there is an element of not needing to be attached to status, greed, appearances, keeping up with the Jones’s. Recognising that status is an illusion, in the sense that when people look at you driving your expensive car they don’t think “Wow, who is that amazing person driving that expensive car?” They think “I wonder what I would look like if I was driving that expensive car”. Once you come to terms with the fact that no one else will care you can release your attachment to needing to meet some appearance to please others.
He notes it is likely that 80% of your investment success will be based on a small portion of your investment. So expect a lot of failure on your pathway to success. It’s like 99% failure and 1% success. There are a lot of quotes around this – even Michael Jordan notes he was so successful because he missed so many shots and lost so many games, he failed enough to succeed.Having enough. Being enough. Understanding that greed and risk, such as gambling at high stakes for high returns has led to many an investors downturn/demise. So – recognizing that you have enough. Your starting point should be “I am enough” “I have enough” so that you are making reasonable and rational investment decisions.On this note – only invest what you have – not what you don’t have.
Getting wealthy versus staying wealthy. Recognising there is one type of mindset to get wealthy versus staying wealthy once you get there.
“No one is Crazy” People are subject to their age, era they grew up in, the economy at the time of their lifetimes. We invest differently based
So recognising that sometimes success actually looks a lot like failure.
Compounding – consistently investing over time is where the results are at. Not being swayed by dips in the market. Staying the course with your strategy until you see results, instead of bailing at the first sign of hardship.
I think this book is a really great way to cut through some of the BS around investing and prime your mindset for what truly is grit and resilience necessary to become a successful investor.
Recognising that its not all roses and pretty pictures. That you may actually be investing for a really long time before you see results. That it takes perseverance, resilience, grit, determination. Starting from a place of being enough and not getting greedy for more than is necessary. Recognising that wealth and status aren’t the be all and end all – true wealth comes down to having your health, loving relationships, freedom, and what he stresses the most is TIME. Having freedom over how you spend your time is the ultimate wealth any human being can experience.
In order to succeed what you really need is consistency and self-discipline. We have recently visited with a friend in Darwin from the defence force and they shared a story about the army and how in the army they teach people a technique of survival which is about setting your parameters or the boundaries you require to survive and then sticking to those boundaries. All it takes is knowing what you want, setting the boundaries and then the self-discipline to stick to the strategy over time.
It’s great having you all on board! I look forward to catching up with you next week where we will be discussing creating a vision for your life!!
Studied law at Harvard Law school. Works as a self-development coach and author.
The 5am Club with Robin Sharma
Why read the 5am club?
If you are looking to enhance your routine, take your life to the next level, improve your efficiency, creativity, productivity in the way you run your daily schedule then 5am might be the book for you.
The book is somewhat lengthy and probably uses a lot of unnecessary story telling to present its gems – however the gems are still there to be had or considered anyhow.
What were the key takeaways?
The book discusses the importance of leading a balanced life to truly attain success in your life. You may be wealthy but have no one to share it with, you may be healthy but be poor and have no money to afford things, you may have a positive mindset but not take action to make things happen in your life.
Sharma proposes 4 main pillars of life that all need to be nourished in order to attain true success and satisfaction in life as follows:
Mindset which is about cultivating a psychology of possibility. Realising that with everything that ever happens in your life you have a choice to own your perception of it and look for the opportunities in every situation whether it feels comfortable or not.
Heartset is about your emotional life. Recognising that you won’t win at life if your heart is heavy with anger, resentment or sorrow. When striving to uplevel, improve your life, it is important to start from an inspired, open loving place. “unexpressed emotions will never die” they will only come to light later in uglier ways – so it is important to repair, rebuild, reinforce a winning heartset in our lives. This isn’t about removing toxic energy but instead re-focusing on positive energy and gratitude. Whatever you feed grows.
Healthset This is about longevity, physical health, vitality. Exercising every day dramatically increases your joy and experience of that day and of your life. Being healthy, feeling good about yourself, feeling good within your skin.
Soulset Being engaged with your spiritual self and your higher self. This may simply be a matter of meditating daily in the mornings on how you want to show up in the day ahead and reflecting on the fleetingness of life or the service you are here to bring to the world. What gifts do you have to share?
—
One of the key elements of the 5am club is engaging with the process of greatness. Sharma talks about scientific studies showing that great achievers or people who have completed great feats throughout history have had habits that have led to that greatness. It is about daily practice, sweating the small stuff, making sure every detail in everything you do reflects you, reflects who you are or who you are becoming and what you bring to the world around you.
“most people take the limit of their vision to be the limit of their world, few do not”…
How do we improve our habits? How do we instal better habits?
It’s your habits not your talent. The strength of your grit and determination, not the strength of your talent that equals a great performer.
Real power is different to fake power. Fake power = assets, money, glitter, shine,
Real Power = never comes from anything external. Genuine power doesn’t arise from your possessions or appearance, it expresses itself when you contact your original gifts and life your life by principles of good habit such as: self-discipline, honesty, integrity.
Cultivate character – honouring inherent vision, usefulness, helpfulness.
To lead is to serve.
Rumi “Give up the drop, become the ocean”
Activate your gifts and become the hero of your life.
Code in a good morning routine.
“Own your morning, elevate your life” – 5am
Remove distractions from your life. Switch off your phone, leave it outside of your sleeping area at night. Go to bed earlier.
Rise early at 5am and complete the 20/20/20 formula which is 20 minutes of reflection or meditation, 20 minutes of physical exercise and 20 minutes of reading or nourishing your mind with something new, inspiring, improving of your soul, your heart of your mind.
Sharma suggests it takes 66 days to instal a new habit, the first 22 days will be hard, the second 22 days will feel messy and the final 22 days will be gorgeous.
If you stick it out for 66 days and know that with some elbow grease you will see yourself through to someplace better and giving yourself that extra time will put you miles in front of other people.
The other really important aspect was rewarding yourself. When you get up early to reward yourself with a piece of dark chocolate at lunch or some other treat that will motivate you to keep going!
Practical application – reality testing
Overall I found this book to be enriching – though maybe it could have used a lot less words to express the same thing. It is still inspiring and I am always looking to be inspired.
By placing the concepts in the forefront of my mind I have managed to start waking up earlier, eat less, increase exercise and become more focused on being here and now.
I think you have to be realistic and practical about what works for your life. In the 20/20/20 formula Sharma places exercise first. Personally, because of where I live I often find it easier to do work or reflection for an hour in the morning and then physical exercise and then do something inspiring.
If nothing else, it is good to focus on the intention to improve your life and to take tangible steps towards making it happen at every opportunity possible.
In general I am a fan of Robin Sharma’s work and find his suggestions insightful, practical and improves my focus and mindset about where I am going and how I am improving in my life.
Michael Hyatt is a leadership expert who has published a number of New York bestsellers. CEO of Michael Hyatt & Company, a leadership development firm helping successful, but overwhelmed leaders focus so they win at work and succeed at life.
Hyatt dispels the 10 essential questions that an aspiring leader needs to ask in order to develop an effective and compelling vision that will lead their life, business or organisation to succeed in whatever endeavour they choose as follows:
Question 1 Are you a leader or a manager?
Question 2 What difference does vision make?
Question 3 What do you want?
Question 4 Is it clear?
Question 5 Does it inspire?
Question 6 Is it practical?
Question 7 Can you sell it?
Question 8 How should you face resistance?
Question 9 Is it too late?
Question 10 Are you ready?
Highlights
In Part 1 (Questions 1 & 2) Hyatt makes a compelling argument for why vision drives everything and is the necessary element for success in just about any endeavour you can think of.
I have come across this before, noting that the vision is the what and when you know your what then you can be flexible on how you get there, but it’s important to know what you are trying to achieve from the outset so you can focus based on the direction you are pointing and the goals you are trying to achieve.
As Hyatt states, it is important that a vision is the next and not the now. It’s about where you are going, the unachieved, the unattained.
How do you cultivate a compelling and effective vision?
In Part 2 Hyatt provides practical tips and strategies for how to cultivate and develop a vision script by focusing on what you want and then testing it through a series of tests to ensure it is durable, sellable, indestructible.
He finishes with working through how to stay on track and keep the vision alive in Part 3 (Questions 8 to 10).
Check out our favourite tips and strategies from the book below:
All vision starts with desire.
What is the difference between mission and vision? They both inform strategy but in different ways.
Mission provides day to day clarity by defining the identity and scope of the business. Without a clear mission you could veer off target and head off into too many different directions or the wrong direction. An effective mission statement keeps you on task by answering 4 questions:
Who are we?
Who do we serve?
What problem do we solve?
What transformation do we offer?
The answer to these 4 questions defines your identity, your clientele and your answer to your customers challenges and the results you produce.
A mission describes what a business is.
A vision describes where it is going.
Mission is here, vision is still out there. Mission is now, vision is next.
Where do we want to take this thing?
What do we really want?
Mission-Vision Differential
Mission is about…
Vision is about….
what
where
here
out there
now
next
brief
robust
Mission should fit on a t-shirt.
Vision robust document that describes your future… 3-5 years. Step into the future and describe what you see in 4 key areas of your business:
Your team
Products
Sales & marketing
Impact
What do you want for your future??
Every statement about the future tells us about how we are performing in the present and influences what we do next.
The Future of Your Team
It’s important to start your vision script with your team. The right team will enable you as the leader to focus on what you do best. They will execute strategy, take care of your customers and cultivate new ones. The right team will blow you away with their ideas, skill and know how.
What does the ideal team look like to you three years out? How does your organisation take care of them and cultivate a winning culture?
Convey enough detail so that other people can see what you see – so together you can build it.
When you imagine your team 3 years out, what do you see?
In terms of their talents,
Skills
Work-life balance
What do you provide in relation to benefits, lifestyle?
Ex. “our team mates live and breathe our ideology. Our team are free to execute their talents without management breathing down their neck. We encourage innovation and experimentation – if something doesn’t work we learn and move on.”
What do you want the future to look like for you and your team? Where do you want to take this thing? What did we really want?
Make a plan for the next 3-5 years in the following areas:
Your team;
Products;
Sales & marketing; and
Impact.
Vision script…every vision statement tells us about how we are performing in the present and influences what we do next.
The future of your TEAM
Your team makes everything else possible. The RIGHT team makes it possible for you the leader to focus on what you do best. They will execute strategy, take care of your customers, and cultivate new ones.
The right team will blow you away with their ideas, ambitions, skills and know how.
What does the ideal team look like to you three years out?
Convey enough detail so you can clearly explain it to others and they can see what you see so you can together build it. When you imagine your team 3 years out – what do you see? In terms of their TALENTS, EXPERIENCE, and Worklife balance. What do you offer in terms of benefits, incentives, opportunities for growth?
Eg. “Our teammates live and breathe our core values and ideology. They possess impeccable character, extraordinary talent and proven track records.
Our employees demonstrate reasonable autonomy in executing and planning their own work without the impediment of overbearing management, stifling bureaucracy or procedural red tape.
We encourage innovation and experimentation. If something doesn’t work we learn from it and move on.”
The future of your products
What are the products or the services you offer?
Eg. “We create products that enable leaders to get the focus they need to win at work and succeed at life”
“We create products that delight our customers, exceed their expectations and deliver dramatic transformation”
Vision is about next not now… the future vision creates a measuring stick for the present but also superior to the present.
You’re not there yet.
“Our ultimate product is not our information or tools but the transformation our customers experience when using them”….
“We routinely say no to distractions masquerading as opportunities”
“We employ stable and talented speakers, coaches and podcasters”
The future of your sales and marketing
Think broadly and philosophically about your marketing… this is fundamentally about how you relate to your customers.
“We employ customer acquisition strategies that make our offers irresistible”
“We understand that our customers and clients are the REAL HEROES and we serve as a guide that helps them overcome their obstacles and achieve their desired transformation”
WHAT IS YOUR IMPACT – the future of your impact
Finally – your vision script should describe the intended outcome of your service/product. What is the result of realising your vision?
Financial impact or reach, influence or something less tangible
“As a result we are transforming our world and achieving outstanding results”
Key financial metrics “we have achieved these outstanding results without compromising our team, values or our culture”.
…..
What if my business is driven by something outside of these key areas? Add what is essential to your business.
How to write your own…
Dedicate time and focus – WHAT DO YOU WANT? Time and focus. Stick with it until you are on point.
“Homo-prospectus” we thrive from considering our prospects…
THREE TIPS FOR CREATING A VISION SCRIPT
You’re trying to paint an inspiring, clear, attractive picture of your organisation’s future – nothing else. It’s not about setting strategy…
Get away and clear your head
Get alone with your own thoughts… Find solitary place away from the office. Unplug from the constant and get in touch with your thoughts.
Believe the best is yet to come
We are conditioned to think about limits/constraints. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. We tend to experience what we expect. We create defences that block our progress.
Part of being clear about the future is being honest about the past and the present and how they are influencing our view of what is possible in the future.
Two feats at once. Total honesty about the here and now and commitment to the belief that it can be better. Far better.
SWOT
“Everything is broken”….
Imagine your future, describe what you see.
The future takes shape of choices today. Write in present tense as though your vision has already has happened.
Eg.
“Nelson books publishes 7 new york times best seller books each year. We sell 10 books that sell over 100,000 units per year. We have great relationships with the authors and the agents and we have a staff of extremely talented and extremely committed people”.
To get started ask yourself a number of probing questions as follows:
What needs to change in our business model so that my team doesn’t burn out or leave?
What kind of authors or list of titles do we need to attract to minimise the turn and maximise our profitability?
How would our organisation stack up against competitors in the market place?
What kind of organisations or processes could we invent that would help our business scale faster?
What interests, concerns or excites you. Do the oracles job for them… what will your business look like in 3 years? How can we become the business that might put us out of business in 3 years? Why would it have a competitive advantage?
Who do we want our customers to become?
Who are you spending time with, where are you travelling, what are you reading?
A vision should be something that personally motivates and interests you. Let your curiosity pull you along… that is what it is for.
The vision scripter. Visiondrivenleader.com
Don’t get hung up on “how” you will achieve your
Questions to ask yourself:
In 3-5 years
TEAM
What kind of teammates do you want to attract?
What characteristics do they all share in common?
How do they work? What is their work ethic?
What do you do to attract top talent?
What is your compensation philosophy?
What does your benefits package look like?
Why are prospective employees attracted to your company?
What makes people beg to join your company?
What does your office environment look like?
Why does that matter to you?
PRODUCTS
What results do your products create?
What value do they deliver?
Who do your products help?
How do your customers feel when they use your products?
What’s the user experience like?
What is the production creation process look like?
How do you choose what to offer?
What makes your products superior to those of your competitors?
SALES & MARKETING
What markets do you serve?
How large is your customer base?
How do you reach them? How much does it cost you to acquire new customers?
What is your cost per lead? What is the lifetime value of your customer?
How do you see your marketing, sales, and customer experience operate?
What’s their role in customer retention and acquisition?
IMPACT
What are your results? What is your revenue? Profit? Staff count or size of your
What financial thresholds excite you as the leader? What do you wish to make free/how do you want to spend your time as the leader? What do you see as your role? How will the growth of your organisation impact you and your team?
How will the industry competitors think of you?
The complexity of your business….may need you to look beyond 3-5 years.
Describe your vision in as much detail as possible.
Read your vision daily. When you are clear in what you want – you capitalise. You tend to filter out opportunities that deter you. Because of your focus and alignment you …
Vision is essential to leadership. He thought it would take 3 years to reach his vision and it was achieved in just 18 months…
QUALIFYING QUESTIONS
Make your vision concrete and compelling and others will join you to make it a reality.
Vision script is wet cement – lets refine it so it is clear:
Is it clear? – every vision script looks different depending on the leader that creates it. Write your vision script in whatever style:
Flows most naturally; and
Helps you sell your vision to your team, etc.
Is it clear? Make it concrete. A good leader thinks in shades of grey and speaks in black and white.
QUESTION 4 – IS IT CLEAR?
Vision grid –
ABSTRACT & IMPLICIT
Quadrant 1 – abstract and implicit. Never completely externalised – foggy. Don’t know what direction.
Quadrant 2 – abstract & explicit – enthusiastic – but has clearly/tangibly expressed what saying
Quadrant 3 – Concrete and Implicit – still not solidly expressed to everyone else…
Quadrant 4 – Concrete & Explicit – a well written vision script can help with. The leader has a well developed concrete vision for the future and has clearly expressed this and articulated it to the team in precise unambiguous language – this allows the team to develop strategies, goals, tasks to execute vision. More than that they can get a sense of the passion and the purpose behind it all – clarity creates connection. There is nothing more satifying than proceeding with confidence. Knowing your team is aligned and passionate about the future because your vision is CLEAR. So – how do you gain clarity??
5 steps to gain clarity:
ADMIT that you are unclear. You want to project confidence even when you don’t feel it…so it’s hard to admit we are missing something. BUT this is the first step.
Recognise your blinders. Ignorance, lack of curiosity, over confidence, cognitive biases, time constraints and fear (karen martin’s 6 issues that hold leaders back)… It takes some self-reflection to see if any of these are present.
Ask for input. Without counsel many plans fail but with many advisors many plans succeed. Spouses, mentors, industry coaches, your team, etc. Ask them what they think – you’re not alone.
Process the feedback. Getting alone, reflecting and journaling. Including core members of your team, review the work together.
JUST START – it’s important to get moving. If you can’t read a sign you have several options – scrunch up your eyes, look at it from a different angle, buy high powered glasses or ask a friend to read it for you. The easiest way to get clarity is to just move closer to the sign. Taking steps forward can bring things into focus. Dont expect a vision to come … patient persistence is key. Vision is a habit, a process….
The road ahead….
Is your vision clear? In order to be a good leader it is important to have clarity of vision so your company can survive and thrive – a vision that not only expresses what you want but is also concrete & explicit.
With that level of clarity (clarity without inspiration leads to boredom and disinterest) and inspiration without clarity leads to excitement without direction.
Inspiration is what we will explore in next question:
QUESTION 5: DOES IT INSPIRE?
“Moved people move people”
It’s not enough to have a vision and its not enough that your vision is clear.
For a vision to be effective it must be powerful enough to shake off complacency and replace it with the motivation to take action. Unless your vision script ignites hearts, minds, passion, and creativity you won’t attract the talent or the buy in from your team necessary to reach your destination. Your customers won’t buy into it either and you will forego the impact and contribution that you might otherwise have on the world stage.
A vision that fails to inspire will surely expire.
Does your vision inspire? There are 4 characteristics to ensure it does:
It focuses on what isn’t, not what is.
It’s exponential, not incremental.
It’s risky, not stupid.
It’s focused on what, not how.
If your vision for tomorrow is more or less than your vision today – it fails.
FOCUS POINTS:-
What isn’t, not what is.
What isn’t… eg. uber. Don’t look at what exists – focus on what you do differently. What is unique – what if we found a way to make the whole process easier… everything is obvious once you know the answer.
Step out into the future and envision what could be …. 70% market share. 72 Billion dollars value – UBER.
Make it BIG.
Exponential, not incremental.
Eg. iphone. Got rid of physical keys & replaced with virtual keys – creating more space for a bigger/better device.
The industry were very sceptical.
Risky, not stupid.
Physical paper planner… paper planner….
Are you likely to fail?
Does your team believe in it?
Does the plan impale your business?
What, not how.
Malala only needed us to yearn for justice, equality. Vision and strategy are important but vision.
By finding your what people find their why. Give yourself permission to imagine the ideal future without worrying about how you will get there.
Changing the script….
QUESTION 6: is it practical?
Hyatt suggests 10 annual goals, break this down into quarterly objectives and then weekly goals of no more than 3-5 … then daily tasks.
Vision is fixed, strategy is malleable.
Stay connected with the vision and allow strategy to evolve and flex. The vision is everything how you get there may change.
The vision strategy differential
The vision stays the same the strategy changes… no plan of operations survives beyond the first task.
The commander and chief will always focus on objectives and be ready to make changes.
Vision isn’t protect
The way to achieve our goals us holding tight to your vision and loosely to your strategy.
Meaning & purpose in the workforce.
Compelling vision script will compel people….
What kind if people do you need on your team??
Teammates live & breathe values…
Humble confident
The vision becomes the benchmark, keeping the vision script in the forefront of your mind…
-do they embrace your vision
-can they help you achieve your vision..
Diversity enhances a teams ability to solve problems…
The visibility problem
Research shows 4/10 staff members really knew what the vision of the organisation was…
All team members need to be on board, enrolling your team.
QUESTION 7: CAN YOU SELL IT?
Can you sell it to 4 key stakeholders… leadership, staff, external stakeholders…
Can you sell your vision script?
Others that need to be involved feel some ownership. You want input, validation, buy in.
Why us the new vision good for them? Why should we care?
HOW TO PRESENT YOUR ASK
To secure approval or buy in from those who count:
Start with the conclusion. Much easier for buyer to concentrate if they know what you want upfront.
Provide the background. Be brief. Provide only the background necessary for them to make an intelligent decision.
Provide the rationale. 3-5 key reasons why your client should accept your recommendation. This should include both why they should agree as well as the consequences of not doing it.
Establish a timetable. How long will implementation take if approved. If in phases, briefly outline the key milestones – over deliver.
State financial impact. Both as a cost or as a necessary investment and the return on investment. Be clear, shoot straight, don’t downplay the costs or hype the benefits.
Anticipate objections – this is where the battle is won or lost. Think of every objection your receiver could possibly ask – don’t risk getting a ‘no’ because you haven’t asked the honest questions. Address the elephant in the room.
Make the pitch – maintain eye contact.
Next week we are looking at SELF-DISCIPLINE! Stay tuned…
https://www.getrichslowly.org/about/ regular guy who went to the school of hard knocks. Made a number of poor choices, found himself in a shitload of debt and then did the hard yards to get himself out of it.
EPISODE 1 What is financial independence?
Think of the matrix. “You’ve felt it your entire life, that there’s something wrong with the world. Like a splinter in your mind driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me…. The matrix. The matrix is everywhere.”
“Remember all I am offering you is the truth and nothing more”.
If you follow this course – you will come to see money differently.
We live in a culture built on debt.
Definitions
What does it mean to be retired?
Leaving one’s job and ceasing to work. “Retirement” relevantly recent concept only available in wealthy nations where citizens have relatively long life spans. Throughout history people have lived short lifetimes.
What is financial independence?
You’re earning enough money to support your spending habits for the rest of your life.
Spend less than you save. Some people in the FIRE movement – save half of their income.
The more you save, the quicker you achieve financial freedom.
Formula includes following elements:
Slash spending
Increase Income
Increase investment
Generally sustainable to take 4%
Multiply your current annual expenses by 25. If the product is less than your savings, you’ve reached FI – Financial Independence.
My expenses would be $50,000 per annum so product $1,250,000 to achieve financial independence.
Financial Independence is not one thing. It is a series of incremental thing. A series of financial milestones – each more exciting than the last.
Money Scripts
Our attitudes and beliefs are shaped by parents, community, and friends.
Our view of reality is like a map to navigate our way through life. If the map is true you will do well. If it is false, you will get lost along the way.
We aren’t born with these maps we pick them up along the way. No two maps are the same. No map is 100% accurate. Our mental maps require constant revision and updating.
Revising our mental maps requires effort. It’s not easy. Most of the time these maps are hidden. They are subconscious.
“Invisible scripts” from book “I will teach you to be rich” by Ramit Sethi
Examples:
‘Money is the root of all evil’
‘I can’t get ahead because the economy sucks’
‘I have to go to university in order to be successful’
‘I can always make more money’
Etc…
Most of our money scripts come from childhood.
WHY IS A MONEY SCRIPT IMPORTANT?
IF you don’t like your relationship with money, you need to re-write your script. You will have to do things differently to get new results. Rewrite your script and act on it to make change.
If you want to make changes you must take action.
EXERCISE 1
Take some time to think about your own money script and think about how it has affected your life.
What does it mean to be rich? What does wealth mean to you?
Freedom. Freedom to do whatever I like and not have to worry about making ends meet or finding money to pay bills.
Think about the first messages about money you ever received. What were those messages? How have they influenced you from childhood??
I recall my mum always saying “we could never own that” “we don’t have any money” and having a “poor person” mindset. She would say things like “it’s better not owning anything” and while there was no value put on anything, we struggled financially, didn’t save for the future, spent impulsively and frivolously, didn’t exercise self-control or self-discipline at all.
It impacted on me significantly as I tended to spend frivolously, not exercise self-discipline or self-control etc and I found the whole experience, conversation around it extremely humiliating.
Imagine you are in a romantic relationship with money. What does it look like? Are you in control or does money control you?
It is reckless in that I am not monitoring it and it has been totally derailed.
What is one step you can take today to improve your relationship with money?
Create a budget and focus on my FI number.
First Step to escaping your money myth is getting clear on purpose
EPISODE 2 – THE POWER OF PURPOSE
It’s important to have the right mindset.
Have a plan. Build a foundation.
What attitudes can you develop that are likely to help you at completing your journey to financial independence? How can you create a plan so amazing that you are willing to walk to work bleary eyed every morning in order to achieve it?
Each of us largely create our own reality and our own happiness by choosing what we focus on and how we react to it.
The shape and content of your life is largely a reflection of how you experience objective reality.
There are two ways that you can primarily change your life:
You can change external conditions; or
You can change how you experience those external conditions – change your internal response to them.
Sometimes the best way to improve things is to change the world around you.
There are times when the best way to improve your life is to change your environment.
Due to many of us are used to following rules and living up to certain standards – so have thus developed an external locus of control.
External vs Internal LOCUS of control
In psychology a LOCUS OF CONTROL refers to how people view the world around them and where they place responsibility for things that happen in their lives.
External
You believe that the world happens to you.You believe circumstances outside of yourself and largely outside of your control are the cause or fate of your happiness and life circumstances. In
Internal
You believe you are in control. You either change your environment or change the way you are reacting to the world around you.
You can change that person or you can change how you relate with that person. Here’s the reality – you can’t control other people.
People who try to change the world around them believe in the external.
People who change themselves to deal with the world. Internal locus of control – shift.
If you don’t like your circumstances it’s up to you to change them.
You have the power to determine your own destiny. FIRE Movement followers: Believe you – Forge your own path. Be proactive rather than reactive.
The pursuit of financial independence is by nature a proactive. Default actions lead to default results.
If you don’t act, you do not escape the matrix.
I want the freedom to do what I want when I want – common attitude of people searching for financial freedom/independence.
When you are running towards something you are being proactive.
HOW DO YOU IDENTIFY YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE??
I had no greater goal so no wonder I got into debt.
George Kinder – certified financial planner
Discover goals and values of client – he considers himself a life planner, not a financial planner.
Asks his clients three questions:-
Imagine that you are financially secure. You have all the money to live for the rest of your life. What would you do? What would you do with your life?
Imagine you go to your doctor. She gives you the sad news that you are about to die. If you knew you were going to be gone in the next few years – how would you change your life? Would you change your life? (noting you don’t have unlimited wealth)
Now you find out – you only have24 hours to live and there is no way to change it. How would you feel? Who did you not get to be? How would you feel about your life so far? How would you spend your last day?
Life planning is all about asking that final question. What would you do/how would you feel about the last day of your life?
Most people miss people, experiences, events, achievements.
EXERCISE – Personal Mission Statement
Steps (each on a new page)
What are my lifetime goals? (let your mind run free, list every single thing you would do with your life? Note the 3 that seem the most important to you)
How would I like to spend the next five years? What would you like to do? Suspend judgement – highlight 3 goals that resonate the most
How would I live if I knew I would be dead in 6 months? When finished find new
New Page – write My most Important goals – and take the top 3 from each of the prior questions
Label “My Mission” is there a theme? Using your list as a launching pad – draft yourself a personal mission statement. Set aside mission statement and walk away. Wait a week.
Review your mission statement. How does it make you feel? You will want a mission statement to hold you in good stead through good times and bad times.
What does a personal mission statement sound like?
“I want to be the best person I can be both mentally and physically. I want to sample all the world has to offer by fostering new relationships, exploring new ideas and daring to try new things. I want to use my skills and experience to improve the lives of others while also improving my own.”
Set goals based on what goals align with your mission statement. Your mission statement shapes how you manage your money and your life. Yours should too.
This week we are talking about self-discipline as discussed in Extreme Ownership: How Navy SEALS lead and win by Jocko Willink & Leif Babin.
It’s no surprise that the key principle expressed by the book is…. Extreme Ownership.
What does that mean?
It means not making excuses ever. Never blaming others. Owning your failures wholeheartedly and when working in a team, encouraging and cultivating a team culture where each member takes complete ownership for the success of the team.
The book goes through a number of key principles of what extreme ownership looks like which we will discuss further below.
no bad teams only bad leaders – if your team isn’t performing, you are responsible for the failure of the team. you need to go back to the drawing board and do things differently.
In order to achieve you need to believe achievement is possible. You have to believe first that what you want to achieve can be done.
Keep it simple. Simple communication. Having a clear mission that everyone can get on board with is important for free flow of communication. If it’s too complicated you will lose people and you will lose your way.
Have a plan. Be prepared for the plan to change.
Cultivate and encourage a culture of extreme ownership.
Finally – and this is my personal favourite – Jocko Willink reminds us that ultimately discipline = freedom.
Discipline is waking up early, doing the hard yards, consistently showing up but when we are disciplined we buy ourselves freedom in our lives.
Discipline is the pathway to your freedom. What a great motivator to stay on track.
This week we are discussing On Fire by Thomas Cromwell… his review of the FIRE movement – Financially Independent Retire Early
This week we are discussing “On Fire” by Thomas Cromwell.
Tom Cromwell professes to be a financial planner. His credentials are vague. In On Fire he reviews the FIRE movement (which stands for Financially Independent Retire Early).
The core objective under the movement is to release yourself from the shackles of debt and achieve Financial Freedom.
Sounds Great! I am sold. Where do I start?
Tom’s narrative suggests that entering into the world of FIRE is not for the fainthearted. The key requirements to achieve success:
Time
Discipline
The earlier you start saving with the utmost discipline in execution of your strategy the more likely you will reap wonderful returns at a younger age. He suggests you need a plan and you need to consistently stick to the plan and not be swayed by emotion or the volatility of the market.
The idea behind FIRE is to live frugally, save as much and invest as much as you can starting from as young as possible. It’s important to know your numbers – How much do you need to retire? What kind of lifestyle are you hoping to achieve? etc.
Diversification of investments is the key – though the book is heavily swayed towards stocks and buying shares. He notes the share market has on average over the past century returned 9 or 10 per cent consistently.
Index funds are safer because they reflect the overall market. If you want to invest in individual shares you need to do your research.
Overall I found the book insightful. I am definitely seduced by the idea of Financial Independence and Financial Freedom.
Next episode we are discussing Minimalism!! Can’t wait.
Disclaimer: This content is a personal opinion only and in no way constitutes financial advice and should not be relied on. You should always complete your own research and seek advice before investing or making important financial decisions for your situation.
